In my entireness.

I miss you in the silence of the dusk,

which the noise of this city-town keeps breaking.

I miss you in the noise of this city-town,

which always leaves my heart crying and aching.

I miss you in the aching of my heart,

and it peeks as moisture from my weary eyes.

I miss you in my weary eyes craving for a peaceful sleep,

and making efforts for it tireless.

And there, yes there,

I miss you,in my entireness.

"तेरी शफ़कत थी , या कोई आज़ाब था ?

ये पता न चला, इब्तिदा कब हुई , कब मुक़म्मल हुआ।"

ps- शफ़कत - affection

आज़ाब - deluge, flood

इब्तिदा - beginning

मुक़म्मल - completion, totality

Usually.

"तू मेरे गीत का कौनसा लफ्ज़ है?

मैंने तुझको कभी, हाँ लिखा भी नहीं। "

No.

Not in these places.

I find you in spaces

of me,

that I don't usually traverse.

And see you building hamlets there.

Lets build a boat.

And sail away

to those places

those spaces

of you

you don't usually traverse.

"तू मेरे गीत का, कौनसा लफ्ज़ है ?

मैंने तुझको कभी, हाँ लिखा भी नहीं। 

गुनगुनाता भी है ,मेरे एहसास में ,

कागज़ों पर मेरे, दीखता भी नहीं 

तू मेरा कौन है ?

मै तेरा कौन हूँ ?

कौन अरमान है ?

कौन अनजान है ?

 ए खुदा , दे बता 

दे बता , ए  ख़ुदा.."

ps: To Unworldly.

To mountains, with love.

Far away on those mountains, I see a small chalet, and there, a woman smiling at me with limpid eyes. She looks familiar. Like I can see myself in her, just a little older and wiser. 

Her eyes tell me she has traversed these paths before, and felt their soul. I can sense stories reeking out of her enchanting smile. Stories of love and loss, despondency and hope, of trust, of laughter, of togetherness, written right here, amidst these hills.

Stories deprived of language, but containing within them all that music is. Stories sans alphabet. For all that was to be said, had been spoken amidst these mountains once. And understood. Absorbed. Between dusk and night. Between coffee and wine. Between sound and meaning. Between emotion and embrace.

As these stories reach me, a strange mountain breeze blows from somewhere and my hair and scarf drift me ahead. I feel myself borne onward along a force whose source seems to be in all that is, in the very beginning of things, in the core which sustains us. I am drawn towards the mountains and as the breeze reaches my ears, I can hear what those two brown wise eyes and one enchanting smile on the other side have to say to me -

" Live. All that is here and now, is yours. Nothing more. Nothing less. Live. One day, you'll understand. And you'll smile, with wet limpid eyes. That day, you'll melt in these mountains, become one with them. After all, its for the molten magma inside, that the mountains rise. Live. "

"इन पहाड़ों में लिपटी हुई 

एक सुबह है यहाँ,

और एक शाम है 

मै इसी का तो हूँ,

इसमें खो जाऊंगा। 

इसका हो जाऊंगा। 

क्यों धुआं हैं यहाँ ?,क्या हुआ है यहाँ ?

क्या मेरा आसमाँ, मुझसे नाराज़ है?

क्या ये मेरी ज़मीं, मुझसे नासाज़ है?

मै इसी का तो हूँ,

इसमें खो जाऊंगा। 

इसका हो जाऊंगा। 

आसमाँ जब मिलेगा धरा से,

कुछ बारिशों में कहीं,

हाँ इसी का तो हूँ ,

मै बरस जाऊँगा  

तुझमें बस जाऊँगा। 

तुझमें सो जाऊँगा 

तेरा हो जाऊँगा। "

PS: wrote prose after a long time. Got reminded of something I wrote years back... Those two brown twinkling eyes.

The colliding elements.

"क्या तुम इन पानियों में घुल गए हो ?

या मैं सागर-सा तुम पर गिरने लगा हूँ ? "

Have you dissolved 
in me 
- as blue -
oh sky!
Or have I begun, 
to fall 
- on you -
releasing myself 
from all 
gravity?

Photograph: Clicked near Lakshadweep, India.

Let me.

I know the darkness between these spaces

I am light.

Will you let me reach you then?

For I'm going to rain tonight.

....तू उलझा है जब जब

तू टूटा है जब जब

इन हौंसलों  सा;

जमा है नमी सा

रहा है  कमी सा

तू जुड़ जाएगा फिर

कहानी-सा इक दिन

तू मिल जाएगा फिर

रास्तों में किसी दिन.

तू इन धमनियों में,

धधकता हुआ -सा

अरमान बनके,

तू जाना-सा कोई

अनजान  बनके ,

मिल जाएगा फिर

रास्तों में किसी दिन.

https://in.pinterest.com/pin/491525746812554826/

Beyond reasons...

I am a human of reason.

But, reasons are heavy, like words are.

And my words can never explain some things.

Their meanings are too bulky to travel to you that far.

So, I do not have a reason to explain why

These times at dusk, and at dawn

I once again like a child 

want to be heard, seen and known.

And I just need you to be there, 

that other side of the horizon in that far away sky

just to ask me once how I had been,

Just to hear from you, that enchanting 'one hi'.

I know its too much to ask for in words.

So, every-time, something in me decides to stay quiet.
You know what it is?
Its that 'I' in I.

picture source https://www.pinterest.com/pin/429390145701717466/

The vow.

वो खत बारिशों-से बरसते तो होंगे...
हाँ, अलग मंज़िलें हैं; हाँ, फासले हैं 
मगर मेरे जैसे, तेरे रस्ते तो होंगे...
क्या तू आज भी, साहिलों की खोज में, फिर बेचैन हुआ है?
क्या फिर तेरे अंदर, बिन आवाज़ आहट के कुछ टूटा है?
मै झंझोरती, तू अगर पास होता...
मै फिर जोड़ती गर, तू  विश्वास होता। 

मगर छू नहीं सकती, तू है हवा-सा, तू रुकता कहाँ है?
तू एहसास है पर, बस एहसास 
और एहसास रब-सा, झुकता कहाँ है ? 

तू तो उजालों-सा बिखरा हुआ है मेरे शहर में 
नहीं बस मगर है,मेरे साथ हमदम,तू मेरे घर में 
जो होता यहाँ तू, तो घर मेरा मंदिर-सा मस्जिद-सा सजता

मगर घर का क्या है 
तू अंदर बसा है 
मैं इन रास्तों में 
तुझे ढूंढ लूंगा 
झंझोर दूंगा 
तुझे जोड़ दूंगा। 

मै गहराइयों में 
मै  ऊचाइयों में 
मै नींदों में अपनी 
पुकारूँगा जब जब 
तू आएगा तब तब , 
नमी -सा, हँसी -सा 
फिर आँखें मूँद लूंगा। 
photograph borrowed from  https://www.pinterest.com/pin/202873158191047564/

The belief of the child...

Do you exist?
I know you do.
Do you love me?
I know you do.

Come, lets shake hands.
Let our joys dance together. 
Let our tears float in that eternal dance.
Let our dreams merge.
So what if we can not.
photograph borrowed from https://www.pinterest.com/pin/491525746807854529/

Love.

Do You believe in Love?

This way that I do....

And will You find it?

At every place You go...

This way that I find You...

Love.

For Me.

Is not a conundrum.

Not a desire.

Nor is it my destination.

Where my journey ceases...

Love.

Is the immaculate energy.

Operating in this cosmos.

Which travels and comforts, and eases...

And when I find you close.

It merges in my soul

and makes me a sanctum.

A sanctum for me and for all.

To restore their faith, their love.

When I love you.

I can love them all...

And when I love them all

I love you all the more...